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 Ilene: Pickup

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twychy
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PostSubject: Ilene: Pickup   Thu Sep 21, 2017 10:12 am

Thanks so much for requesting Ilene xx


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Ilene

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Fri Oct 06, 2017 5:21 pm

@Twychy

Hi!  I see you deleted my tags.  I have been very poorly, did go to one group I have been on a long time bc they made me motm.  Also my computer is messed up, and not in frame of mind to do something else. My mom's dementia has been worse, and they keep putting off her 24  hour aides I have been working on, since March.

I am probably going to have to find a dr. to do more back surgery and revision back surgery, bc I took the less invasive route, bc I was terrified, now the bone on that level is moving around and impinging a nerve.  I should have gone the other way, but it was 7 days hospital and I am terrified of hospitals and morphine drip and long recuperation.

I have been depressed for 2 months, but the last straw was when the neurologist told me if I lose feeling in my legs or am incontinent go to the nearest hospital  (a horrible one) and they would need to do emergency surgery or it would be permanent.  Just thinking about 2 bags attached to me and my husband taking care of me and eventually resenting me, is making me not able to function at all.  The bad news about my mother's aides actually helped me today bc it got my mind off me.  I am such a baby I am bawling my eyes out now.

I am sorry I did not pick up the tags, I understand if you don't want me to request, bc I can not with what is going on guarantee I will be in all the time, I will try my best.  Do not want to lose my online friendships, and you are definitely one of them!

Hugs & love, Ilene

PS  I might c and p this to other taggers bc it is so hard to type but will leave certain things out.

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twychy
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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Mon Nov 13, 2017 6:13 am

Aww So sorry they were deleted i will make it up to you ..So sorry to hear that youre going through this pain and fear... I wish there was something comforting to be able to say but can only say I care and wish with all my heart that you werent having such an awfultime of it... I will make sure I leave the tags up a bit longer in future so you just concentrate on getting in a good head space and dealing with the problems that you can and getting in to collect them when you can xxxx x Ive left you an extra tag here to make up for the deleted ones xxx


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twychy
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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Mon Nov 13, 2017 6:13 am

will replace the tag lol as I did your name wrong sorry its old age lol

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Ilene

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:55 am

Twychy I love game tags and love these tags!!  Tysm for making them for me! ♥️

Now I will send you something I sent Linda.  No need to respond to most of it.
Just want  you to know what is going on with my life, bc soon you won't see me for quite awhile.






Went to Hospital Special Surgery, I am so sick of bad news.  The last surgeon  (Imo- doctors won't come out and say this) botched my surgery badly.  Titanium screws that are supposed to be the strongest metal- one got lodged in the joint above the area operated on (he did L4-L5, it is lodged in L3-L4) and another broke inside me.  My lowest disc L5-S1 is gone and so is bone in that part of my back.  Plus I was supposed to have a Titanium cage and it is plastic, which the doctor today said he would never use. Also, the doctor today did agree that my bottom disc went bc of pressure from the surgery on the middle one, that is why they always wanted me to have 3 level but too scared.  I am furious, he knew I was f'd up and when I said my pain was no better he said I might have to learn to live with it. Also, and I am an idiot for listening should have known better, but after 8 wks he told me I could do anything and I asked even water slides cuz grandchildren were visiting and as a surprise we took them to an indoor water park.  Never should have gone on water slides!!


Probably getting surgery Dec 12, there goes seeing gc for Xmas and all the other holidays.  First date was 11th, but that's my birthday not that it matters.  This is my 3rd surgery this year.  The reason I want to get it done right away is with my health insurance I have reached the limit where I do not have to pay anything else this year.  Not so easy to do and I have done it 4 yrs in a row, this year I met it in June.  I just hope there is no blizzard.  I am deathly afraid of the pain that I will be having post op and so scared of hospitals, but this one is number one in the country for revision surgery.

Soooo I have to do something with stupid PB bc I have no idea how sitting will be after surgery. I have until April, but now not sure if I best take care of it now, not organized and still deleting, not enough hours in the day.


My mom might have ovarian cancer.  All signs point to a woman's cancer, (cyst that grew bigger, lining thick in the uterus I think, and bled from vagina).  A sonogram will show it, but what's the point, no chemo and no general. Why put her through a vaginal sonogram at 91? She had one last year and it hurt her so much.   She definitely has a skin cancer and  I have to take her to the doctor twice, to evaluate and operate.  it is in her nose she had it 20 yrs ago and they do the Mohs treatment- no chemo, and only a local- I hope.  Otherwise that isn't happening.

I have to go to NY City for pretests, bloodwork, etc.  We are doing Thanksgiving, my sister talked me into it, then gave me the hardest time, I don't even want to see her face, she is toxic to me and even her children say there is one person that ruins family occasions and we all know who it is.  Have to clean my house and declutter, no time to breathe and back is horrible pain.  I have to go to each board and tell them something, this is too much pressure now, I have no time for anything.  Will lose a vacation (they already extended it bc of my back surgery last year, doubt they will do it again.)  I am so very overwhelmed and scared of the surgery too.  Should be a four day stay.  Will be on heavy duty pain meds and I wake up nauseous everyday, so it should be fun.  Also terrified of hospitals.

So w/o going into details of the sister drama, I told you the surface of everything on my plate.  You won't believe what she did to me concerning Thanksgiving, which she begged me to do and then gave me the hardest time.

I have to get my mom taken care of before the 12th regarding skin cancer, first evaluation then hopefully operation under a local and everyday I have to do something is so stressful, I have so many things to do.  Need TG like a hole in the head.  I wanted to do it up, but now think I will buy a lot of the stuff in a warehouse club, no time for special cooking.My sister pushed me into doing TG bc it was possibly one of the last with my mother.  She has 3 days off a week and never visits my mother. I do everything for my mom, and I am grateful that in this time I am closer to her than I ever was, but there is so much wrong with her.   Need this like a hole in the head.  House disaster back is killing me from cleaning. 

Then my sister did something so terrible busting my chops concerning the
Thanksgiving she pleaded with me to do, I lost 10 lbs in 3 days and another five in the next 7!  I am not heavy anymore, who loses 10 lbs in 3 days?  My stomach felt like I was getting stabbed and stress of the highest nature kicked my metabolism into high gear.

Now that I am over it I know I will start to gain the weight back.  If you ever want to lose weight I will send my sister, I call it the Robin diet.

The switch to fotki, believe it or not is really weighing heavy on me, stressful so much so.  Also I think how many folders and subfolders can I start.  It is like a full time job!!  I have to organize this and still deleting Allie's.  I think I will need to get this done before surgery bc I do not think I will be able to sit for awhile and I do have a deadline with PB.

Know this is long, mainly wanted to let you know if you don't seem me that much I am so overwhelmed with everything.    When I post my MIA you will know the reason why.  






Hugs & love, Ilene :;kiss:

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twychy
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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:52 pm

Aww Hun I am so sorry   I  can appreciate how worried you are but come end  March you'll be so pleased that it's over and you'll feel so much better..  Families.. we all have that  someone that we just cant get along with.. I havent seen my brother for years..  sad but it probably happens in families more than people willing to say...  I had lot of albums but I deleted quite a lot of tags in error on Photobucket when I was trying to organise them   in a way i'm glad now  it took me days to download  those I had left onto my external hard drive .. I will have to do the christmas tag again as I put irene and notIilene on it... I keep doing that   think because my dad once had a girlfriend called Irene before he met my mum.. I reckon they argued about it a lot  as I remeber it so wel..lol..  thanks for requesting and   hope  things start going right for you soon...  will keep you in my prayers xxx

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Mon Nov 20, 2017 8:59 pm

They are lovely!!  Did not notice Irene!
Ty for the beautiful tags and ty for the kind words.
I am beyond stress, but I will have to deal.

Tons of hugs, Ilene

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Fri Dec 01, 2017 8:20 pm

Thank you for requesting.. xx


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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Mon Dec 04, 2017 11:33 pm

They changed my surgery date to Dec 14th
Not thrilled bc I will be there during the weekend, but it is a good hospital.
What was more worrisome was my bp.  Just happened to take it Friday night when others were and it was 168/98.  Kept monitoring it and as recently as Sunday morn, it was 16/103!
Never had high blood pressure, but have been oh so stressed!
Then it started to come down and tonight (though especially relaxed and tired) it was 92/59!
Never been so low.  There must be something really weird with me with so much fluctuation!
Anyway it came down, thank goodness.

Tysm Twychy for the gorgeous tag!! So pretty!!
I looove it, tysm!!  Hugs, Ilene ♥️

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Thu Dec 07, 2017 1:30 pm

wow thats quick.. and your blood pressure prob high cos of stress keep yourself cheery between now and when you have your op.. watch lots of comedy things on tv and just try not to think of it until you have to il have to find lots of jokes t pop in your mail to keep you laughing and cheery xx glad you liked it and hope you can use this one as well xx

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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Thu Dec 07, 2017 1:39 pm


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PostSubject: Re: Ilene: Pickup   Wed Dec 13, 2017 10:39 am

I see I missed again, Twychy- I have been sick.  Surgery Thursday was this close to not happening.
Will post what I posted in chat I think- an MIA  Love you sweet-ums!!



This is a revised copy and paste of another MIA I had to post.

Thursday big spine surgery takes place - I had another one in May, bc I was scared and went the less invasive route.

For those of you that know the spine- this was my lumbar spine.  The level was L4-L5 being operated on.  The bone was moving around and nerves were getting trapped.  To sort of over simplify here is where I am at since then.  The fusion never fused.  My last dics which is just under that level (L5-S1) is no longer there- it and the bone around it is ash.  He told me his cage and the titanium screws wouldn't move if I fell out of a 50 story window.  One titanium screw broke and another ended up in the joint in the level above (L3-L4). Now I need surgery on all three levels, rods, arthritis scraped, bone grafts, a new cage bc he used plastique instead of titanium and more stuff I don't need to further bore anyone on. 

Also my never been high before pressure was as high as 202/124 - various real life situations have me stressed to the max. and of course the surgery in the back of my mind.

So scared of the pain I keep getting told by well meaning people that I am in store for and scared of the heavy duty pain meds,
that I fear so much bc I have such a problem with nausea, even non provoked by pain meds.

Plz keep positive thoughts for me for Thursday. 

I am terrified!!!  Will be in hospital 4 or 5 days, was told the worst of the recoup is 6-8 weeks. 


My best to you all, happiness and health in the New Year!!  Huge hugzzz, Ilene

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